gather up these scattered blessings

it might have been 3 weeks ago
that a nice man named David
came into the the store and told me
that I should check out the church he goes to.

I havent been giving G-d enough of my time
this summer...drinking too much, praying to little...
(Its seldom been in large amounts, and I have a great
appreciation for wine and tequila...but I dont want it to
even become something that I do out of habit...
whatever those around me might be doing)
I've made alot of friends here (its easy for me to do)
and they are tres hipsters (in this town anyway)
but not a single one of them is a Christian...
and I get tired of being a cool kid.
I consider myself a fairly strong individual...
but its foolish to think that my consistently bad company
won't have some effect on me.
(though I also think that Ive had some good effect on them)

Thats why I went to church tonight...

I didn't know anyone there...I wasn't even
sure that I knew where it was...
I just knew I had to go...
I have so many excuses...p0-mo rhetoric
about the needlessness of actual church services...
that I dont need to go...that its a remnant of
a too old legalistic system...
its all bullshit really--
so I can sleep in on Sunday mornings.

It was good...good enough that Ill continue
to go until I leave here (whenever that may be)
and I thank G-d for it.

The pastor is not a great speaker,
and the church is, overall, just a touch more
experiencial than Id like...
but Ive been thinking TOO much lately...
it just felt so good to praise G-d.

I thought about you during the service...
I don't know what part G-d plays in making things
happen...like us starting to date for exampli
but I do believe that the goodness of our
relationship will be directly related to
how we are are relating to G-d.
I need to try harder...for G-d, for me, for us.


I didnt end up sitting alone for long of course...
I must have looked lonely.
After church I ended up in some
overcrowded hot-tub with a bunch of very friendly people...
chatting about theology and inseams.
All in all, an excellent night.

i love you babe...